Boobies make me smile

I am the pervert lady down the street. I discovered this a few days ago.

It was later on at night maybe 8 or so and I had just gotten done gardening and then grocery shopping. I don't wear stilettos and a push up bra to garden in FYI. I wear shorts with stains and a shirt that says "Boobies make me smile".

Ryan bought me this shirt a few years ago as a joke and I love it.

This is what happened...and I feel horrible. Kinda.

So I had just gotten done doing the gardening and grocery store stuff. I heard a knock at the door. I answered it and this cute little boy, maybe 11 or so, was standing there. He asked me if I would be a pledge for his track meet. I could pledge $1 or more for every lap he ran. The whole time we were talking he had this goofy grin on his face. I just thought he was being a weird kid.

No.

I had a shirt on that said Boobies make me smile. Of course an 11 year old boy thought it was funny. I realized after I went back inside that I had the shirt on. I bet his parents won't let him come over anymore.

We share

The other night I am getting ready for bed. Isaiah is on a great sleeping schedule now. Sleeping 7-8 hours a night. So I am pretty much over my sleep deprivation. This time I am blaming Ryan and his sleep deprivation. Or maybe he is color blind. Either way...this is what went down.

As I was saying...I was getting ready for bed. Went into the bathroom to brush my pearly whites. And my toothbrush was wet. Why was it wet? I hadn't used it. Right? I thought about it to make sure I wasn't crazy. I decided I am not crazy. Here is my convo with Ryan.

Me: Babe did you use my toothbrush?
Ryan: No, I used mine.
Me: My toothbrush is wet.
Ryan: I dunno babe. I used my toothbrush.
So I grabbed my toothbrush and took it over to him.
Me: Did you use this one?
Ryan: Yes. That is mine.
Me: NO IT ISN'T!!!!!!!! This is mine! I told you 2 weeks ago that I got you a new one.
Ryan: Oops...
Me: So we have been using the same toothbrush for how long???????????

Then we laughed like a couple of idiots and I shrugged my shoulders and then I burned my toothbrush. No no no I am just kidding. I love Ryan and all his germs. But seriously. He is using HIS toothbrush now.