Molly the barker

This is my Molly. Molly has a problem. She likes to bark. A LOT. A LOT, A LOT, A LOT. This was what I brought home February of this year:

Does that look like a loud obnoxious dog? No. She was so cute and quiet and sweet. Well now she is almost a year old and she is still cute and sweet. Quiet? Not so much. She is fine in the house and in her crate when we leave. But, something awakens in her as soon as we let her outside. I don't know what it is. There could be no noise, no people or cars, no shadows, and she will bark her stinking head off. It frustrates the crap out of me. It's not a bark here and there. Its constant. Like my brothers farts. Like this "bark, bark, bark, bark, bark, growl, bark, woof, woof, bark, bark, bark bark BARK!!!!"

I am not joking. Ask anyone in my family. Or ask my neighbors that are too nice to admit that she bugs the shit out of them. I have been going back and forth with getting a bark collar for Miss Molly. I didn't know if I would have to get that drastic or not. I kept praying she would grow out of it. But it almost just gets worse. So, last Sunday me and Molls went on a trip to our local Petco. I learned there are different kinds of bark collars. There are the shock collars and there are also a less "mean", as I would say, option. It's a bark collar that sprays Citronella in their face when they bark. Here is the one I bought.

The Innotek Spray Bark Collar is easy to use and effective. It senses your dog's bark and releases an immediate burst of citronella-scented spray toward his snout. While not harmful, the spray is very disruptive and dogs learn quickly to stop barking. The Perfect Bark™ Anti-Bark Spray Bark Collar detection ensures your dog's bark is the only sound that will cause the correction. Safe for indoor and outdoor use.

So let me tell you something....it worked!!!!! When she has it on (which is whenever she is outside) she will not bark. It was actually pretty funny the first time she barked with it on. She jumped back and was looking around like "What the fuck just sprayed me? What in the Hell? Crockett...did you see that shit?" And Crockett just looked at her like she was crazy. Yesterday we had landscapers doing something next to the road behind our house AND our neighbors cute little kids were out jumping on the tramp. Normally this would be complete grounds for Molly to go on a barking rampage. But with that collar on, she did not make a peep! I was such a proud Mommy. I am so excited that this worked and that I don't have to get the evil shock kind.

Now, what can I do about her taste for toilet paper???